1. Do you like blue cheese? I sure do. In salads. On a burger. It's good in a lot of places.

2. Have you ever smoked a cigarette? I went through about two months in the 9th grade when I smoked. Then when I moved to Arizona, I smoked for about two months. I never went back to cigarettes after that.

3. Do you own a gun? My husband owns guns and what's his is mine. ;)

4. What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic? I don't.

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointment? Sure don't.

6. What do you think of hot dogs? I think trying to find the hot dog place with jhusdhui was hilarious. I think they're fantastically good some of the time.

7. Favorite Christmas Song? I WANT A HIPPOPOTAMUS FOR CHRISTMAS! (Only a hippopotamus or sheepdog will do...)

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Rockstar. Blue. Yummy goodness.

9. Can you do push-ups? On my cute little exercise ball I can :D

10. What is your favorite movie? Fight Club!

11. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? My wedding ring. My right hand ring I got from my mother-in-law.

12. Favorite hobbies? Is hitting people a hobby? Writing.

13. Do you work with people who idolize you? I sure have ;)

14. Do you have ADD? I like to think that I don't but I don't think I'm the best judge of that.

15. What’s one trait that you hate about yourself? Uh. Hrm. Yeah, I haven't got anything, sorry.

16. What’s your middle name? Shirley :D

17. Name three thoughts at this moment: I love that it's raining outside. I finally have my family and I couldn't be happier. SHEEPDOG PUPPIES!

18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday: ...pancakes, coffee, and eggs? :D

19. Current worry right now? I worry about all the responsibility that comes with owning a person. But it doesn't last long at all because I know I'll do a fantastic job.

21. Current hate right now? I have to go to work tomorrow.

22. Favorite place to be? I love to be in bed snugged up with my husband and my boy.

23. How did you bring in the New Year? With sweet, sweet dreams. I'll do better this year, I promise.

24. Where would you like to go? Funkytown? DISNEYLAND. And back to Duck's patio. And Colorado so I can hug my pup. I misses him.

25. Name three people who will complete this? Matt did. J will. Uh. I did! Three!

26. Whose answer do you want to read the most? I liked reading Matt's answers the most. :D

27. What color shirt are you wearing? Green

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? Whatever j's sheets are made out of are delicious.

29. Can you whistle? Like one note, yeah.

30. Favorite color? Rainbow. Rainbow's a color, right? 

31. Would you be a pirate? If I could do the raping and pillaging, sure. Otherwise no.

32. What songs do you sing in the shower? I'm singing in the rain!

33. Favorite girl’s name? Daphne. Mystery.

34. Favorite boy’s name? Puck.

35. What’s in your pocket right now? A debit card and my license and a stub for Milk.

36. Last thing (Person) that made you laugh? Matt, j, and the gay IHOP waiter :D

37. Best bed sheets as a child? I had NKOTB at some point :D

38. Worst injury you’ve ever had? I sliced my thumb open on a pineapple can lid. I also tore my back up over a metal tent stake. :D

39. What is your favorite snack? Anything dark chocolate.

40. Favorite thing to do on Sundays? Play WoW!

41. Who is your loudest friend? Chris. Hands down.

42. How many dogs do you have? *sobs* None.

43. Does someone have a crush on you? I like to think so.

45. What is your favorite book? The Giver

46. What is your favorite candy? ...everything is my favorite candy.

47. What is your favorite sports team? I default to j's favorite sports teams.

48. What song do you want played at your funeral? I haven't thought about my funeral in a long, long time, surprisingly.

49. What were you doing 12 AM last night? Being gushy sappy close with my boy.

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning? Today is perfect.

This is the great thing about writing, about having these ideas, and about communication in general: once I get it out, it's out for good.

Yesterday my mood was less than pleasant. Some boys might disagree, but I really was not having a good day. I was mad and the angry was carrying to frustration which was carrying over into stress which was carrying into over really negative thinking and perpetuating the horrible thoughts I'd been having which essentially got me into more trouble than I needed to be in!

But then I got it out. It probably didn't come out as nicely as it should have because I was so frustrated at that point, but it came out, I got a response, and immediately after that my day brightened. Immediately after it'd been dealt with, I was done with it. The resentment that had built up, the anger that came with the resentment, they both finally packed their bags and went on their way.

The trouble with learning more about yourself is that sometimes you find problems you didn't even know you had. You can find anger in places you'd never even think to look. But once you address those, or at least acknowledge them, you can see what an effect they've been having on your life. I'm ready to start that part of my life over again. There are a few more steps I need to do in order to make it a positive experience, but once that's done, I'll be set.

The point is, really, that my mood was a drastic change from being so angry and hurtful that morning to absolutely giddy that evening. A lot of that had to do with the family dinner, I'd think. There's just something wonderful about getting everyone together and going out. Or even staying in! So long as babies and cats aren't what's on the menu.

It's in the air, riding on the waves of the wind, circling around each and every one of us. Few choose to acknowledge it the way that they acknowledge autumn or winter. They don't acknowledge it with dread like they do the coming snow fall, when the flakes are fluttering before their eyes. There are only a select few out of a town, a handful out of a city, that will recognize that tonight is not just the eve of haunting; it's the eve of sanity.

Enjoy your last day before NaNo, my fellow novelists!

Last night was an enjoyable bit of spontanaeity. I wanted to see Choke and was afraid it was leaving theaters (...the theater [singular] that it was playing in) by Friday. Because I was working under the assumption I wouldn't have to go to work until 10am (huzzah!) me and the kitten decided we'd go see it last night. Of course half way over I got called and told I was opening, which meant I'd get about four hours to sleep once I got home. I really wanted to see the movie though and he'd already driven all the way out here. It would have been a waste to send him right back home.

Of course, if I were sane, I would have just rented a movie and watched it at home so I could have gone to bed sooner, but I'm not and neither is he (though he did offer to just cancel for the night) so to Choke it was! The movie was actually pretty good. Not stellar of course, but that's just because I don't like how all of his movies/books end up having the same theme to them. The writing is good and the characters are fine and there was enough frontal nudity to keep just about anyone happy and the lesson was there and it was a lot better than what the book sounded on the jacket so I was fantastic.

Plus, I got to spend lots of time with my boy. Seems silly to miss someone after only two days, but luckily I wasn't the only one feeling that. Not only that, but it was incredibly nice to find that I have someone that I can call up like this to go out and do things with randomly. No big plans. We're capable of making plans, sure. We're going to a corn maze for the 1st of November. Someday we'll go to a theater. Next July we're going to New Mexico. We're fantastic at making plans. Sometimes they're just not needed though.

We talked a bit about sexual attraction to people and how both of us seem to need personality, need to know the person, before we can be sexually attracted to them. We talked about love, and how easy it is to fall into it. We talked a lot about communication and the underlying issues in some relationships and how simple they would be to resolve except you have to know how. I talked about that, mostly. He was nice enough to just listen. It wasn't quite a rant. No, it was a bit of a rant. I also talked about how different he's seemed in the past two days. Good different. Something different though. I can't quite put my finger on it. I'd say he's sweeter, but that's not quite it. I'd say it's a whole lot of saying the exact perfect things and just feeling exceptionally close to him, for whatever reason. So there's that. There's also the fact that he looked just damn adorable last night. I...think, maybe, he got pressed up against the car for a moment of groping and pure wanting. Maybe. Can't remember clearly. ;)

Mostly, it was just like that first date, where everything went so wonderfully that I have to wonder when perfection runs out and reality sets in. Except that maybe, just maybe, I chose just right this time. Maybe, just maybe, I was finally able to blend perfection with reality and there's nothing to have run out. I think I'll go with that, even if it's for something as simple as for once I want to be the hopeless romantic.

1. Have you ever felt guilty or ashamed after a sexual experience?

Yep. Except it really wasn't a sexual experience. We'd just opened up our marriage. Well, put a foot in the door of open anyhow. I'd had permission for years to kiss other people but never really took advantage of it. One night at a house party I got really, really drunk and was making out with my best friend's boyfriend's roommate. He was pierced up and down. I had absolutely no intentions of having sex, I just wanted to kiss. But afterwards (so it was like 4am) I felt guilty so called up Matt, woke him from a dead sleep, and confessed to kissing another boy. He just laughed at me, but I honestly couldn't sleep for two days after. Haven't felt guilt since then, but that's because we actually discussed our limits and boundaries after that.

2. Did you ever own a fake ID?

Never had a need for one.

3. How often do you tell white lies? Is it with or without thinking?

Not that often. It's always with thinking though.

4. On a scale of 1-10, how well do you receive constructive criticism?

-5

5. Have you ever shaved your pubic hair?

I do it frequently. I just haven't decided if I like it more than not having to shave it.

Bonus: What percentage of women do you think are capable of handling being in a "friends with benefits" relationship? How about men?

I had a fantastic friends with benefits relationship. I handled it well, I think. He obviously did not. You'll know this because he's not around anymore. I think most men and most women cannot handle these kinds of relationships. I sure wouldn't know though, because I don't know the average guy or girl and I sure don't know what an average relationship looks like. ;)